Be prepared to lose:

Striving for success is nothing to be ashamed of, but being willing to lose is just as important.  It keeps us humble and reminds us that no one is perfect.  Losing teaches us how to overcome and how to do things better in the future.  Whether it be at work, in sports or in a relationship; losing allows us to re-evaluate how we do something and how to improve on ourselves in the future.  No team goes undefeated forever, no one closes every deal and no one wins every argument.  However, accepting this before the fact rather than after allows you to ease the bitterness of defeat and focus on what really matters.  Improving on the fundamentals sets you up for success in later endeavors and winning then becomes a byproduct of all that work.  While with relationships, you realize that it’s not about winning or losing but focusing on a compromise and how to improve on yourself rather than trying to fix the other person.  Loss is part of life and we can often learn far more from it than from victory, which is why it’s ok that everyone doesn’t get a trophy at the end.

Never eat the last cookie:

Never eat the last cookie:  If I said nothing else from this point on, the title alone would be a great life message.  This is actually hard for me to write considering I think that warm cookies and milk are a perfectly respectable meal at any time of the day.  Especially if they are crispy on the outside and filled with gooey chocolate and walnuts inside.  The crunch and the sweetness mixed with the creaminess of of cold milk.  I’m pretty sure nothing in the world is better for you.  That being said, it’s better to give than to receive or so they tell me.  The fact is it’s not about the cookie itself but the act of sacrificing a little bit of your own happiness in order to bring a little joy to someone else.  In fact it’s the best when it’s a little kid that you’re giving up “your” cookie for.  The smiles and laughs make it all worth it.  It starts by never eating the last cookie and who knows maybe even becomes giving up your time to help those less fortunate than yourself.

My little devil:

So I don’t know if this is a life message so much as a warning to anyone thinking of getting a puppy.  I have two dogs, one is the “perfect” dog that never gets into trouble, always minds, never begs and rolls over when you say BANG!  Then there’s the “other dog.”  This one is the one that I am convinced has it in her tiny little head that her job in life is to eat everything that I own and get into as much trouble as possible.  Marley aint got nothing on my dog believe me.  Since getting this little bundle of joy, she has eaten, not destroyed, eaten 19 plants in my backyard, ripped out every line from my drip system, eaten 13 c.d.’s (those are what we had before ipods), 6 magazines, 2 rugs, a pigeon, the rocks from my backyard and most recently the last chapter of my current book; because the last chapter really isn’t that important after reading 700 pages of a story.  Plus it might surprise you to know that she weighs in at a whopping 30 lbs.  Now before everyone gets all crazy and says I need to walk her more or I need to give her toys to play with, know that I walk her every day, she has toys(she usually goes and picks one up and drops it at my feet when I’m cleaning up her mess) and she has another dog to play with all day long in a big backyard.  Having said all of that though, I still wouldn’t give up having the little devil in my life.  Maybe it’s the fact that she is always super excited to see me when I get home and makes even the worst day better or that look she gives me that means it’s time for a belly rub.  Maybe it’s the circles she does when I ask if she wants a cookie or the way she snores like a freight train.  She’s curious and energetic, which sucks for my house, but is still fun for me.  She reminds me that no matter how bad things get, she will always be there to make them better, even if it’s just a kiss on the nose.  Imagine if we all treated the ones we loved with such respect and utter loyalty.   Dogs are pretty good at showing us just how selfish we can really be, even when they are anything but.

Small towns:

Small towns:  So my parents just bought a summer place in a small town and I think the thing I’m most excited about is going up for a small town Fourth of July celebration.  If you’ve never seen one you’re missing out. There’s music and dancing along with the smell of fresh baked pastries.  There’s laughter in the air and kids running around with streamers and sparklers.  Flags fill the streets and everyone is proud of what they have and what they’re working for.  There are footballs being tossed and baseballs being thrown and if you didn’t know any better you’d think you were standing in Mayberry.  But above all else you realize that despite the technology and or the rush of the big city, it’s the people in the small towns across the Country that truly show us how lucky we all are to live in America.  They’re proud of what they have, even if it’s so little and take the time to make sure that everyone is taken care of without needing a law to tell them to.  They don’t need nightclubs or celebrity hotspots to make them feel good or fancy clothes and an expensive car to make them feel important.  They are in their yards on Saturday and in church on Sunday and when dinner is served they all sit together and actually talk to one another.  Small towns remind us of what was once important in America and all the hope that comes with it.  So the next time you want to celebrate the birth of this great nation don’t plan a trip to the lake to get drunk or weekend in Vegas, but instead take a trip back in time; to a small town near you.

Words:

Words: Some are meaningful, some are meaningless, and then there are words that just hurt.  It’s amazing how often something we say can come across the wrong way and end up ruining everything.  Maybe it just came out wrong or maybe you really do think it and you just got caught.  One thing is certain, you can never take back something once you’ve said it and those words may end up ruining a relationship, destroying a friendship or costing you a job.  Words are powerful no matter how small they are and we often get so caught up in trying to impress someone with a witty comeback or win a fight with verbal assault that we forget just how hurtful those words can be.  Instead be quick to think but slow to speak and make sure that the words that are coming out of your mouth are meaningful and heartfelt or will solve a problem and not create one.   So choose yours carefully because they can often have resounding effects.

Time

Time:  Don’t ever say you don’t have enough time.  Not having enough time is a problem of time management.  People that say it are the ones that don’t make the best use of their time and prioritize.  You have exactly the same number of hours per day as were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leondardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin and Albert Einstein.  It’s what you do with your time that determines greatness not the hours in the day, so don’t every waste any of it.  Remember that no one ever said on their death bed that they wished they had worked more, but many would have spent more time with their family if they had to do all over again.  So what are you doing reading this?  Go and start building your legacy.

A simple lesson

So…haven’t been writing much lately.  Probably the reason things have been so unclear; have to clear out all the clutter that’s up there to make room for new things to be learned.  To get me going I pulled out my favorite book, “All I really need to know I learned in kindergarten” by Robert Fulghum.  If you’ve never read it, you’re missing out; uncommon thoughts for common things.  It’s the kind of book that’s so simple but has a profound impact on your life, at least it did for me.  I’ve read it over twenty times now and every time it gets better and always puts me into a better place.  It talks about what we all learned but many of us seem to have forgotten and may never get back.  “Most of what I really need to know about how to live and what to do and how to be I learned in kindergarten.  Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate school mountain, but there in the sandpile at Sunday school.  These are the things I learned: Share everything, play fair, don’t hit people, put things back where you found them, clean up your own mess, don’t take things that aren’t yours, say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody, wash your hands before you eat, flush, warm cookies and milk are good for you, live a balanced life…learn some and think some and draw and pain and sing and dance and play and work every day some, take a nap every afternoon, when you go out into the world watch out for traffic, hold hands and stick together, be aware of wonder.”  We can all learn something about how to be a better person in the world; I’m going to start with this.

Have integrity:

Have integrity:  It’s easy to sit up on your white horse and judge all those around you when you yourself aren’t faced with tough decisions.  But those that are faced with those choices and still keep their honor are the ones that are to be truly honored.  It starts by saying that you would never steal or break the rules and then turns into; “well everyone else is doing it and are much more successful.”  Integrity is about continuing to do the right thing even when it costs you something.  Not giving in, no matter how much there is to gain.  Think it doesn’t matter because you are just one person so why not get what you can when you can?  Remember that your actions can have an extraordinary impact on those around you.  You could very well end up influencing more people than you think and then imagine what the world would be like if it was suddenly cool to have values again.

Compliment the meal when you’re a guest in someone’s house:

Compliment the meal when you’re a guest in someone’s house: It doesn’t matter if the meal was awful, someone was kind enough to invite you into their home and cook you a meal.  Show a little common courtesy and say thank you.  If nothing else you know you’d appreciate it if someone threw you a compliment, regardless of how far off you may be about your own culinary skills.  Remember the golden rule.

Take a nap on Sunday afternoons:

Take a nap on Sunday afternoons:  Remember in kindergarten when you’d have lunch and your milk and then you’d pull out your mats and get to take a nap?  It seems like none of us ever really appreciated how nice that time of our lives really was.  However, you still have the opportunity to go back to  your childhood if only for a half an hour once a week.  Take a little “me” time and enjoy your day of rest with a nap.  You’d be surprised at just how much of a difference it can make in your life to just take a nap and let the world go by.  You’ll wake up more refreshed and ready to take on whatever life has to throw at you.